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Rainbow Twins' Birth Story

When we learned we were having twins, it was a lot to take in. When we learned they are mono-mono twins, occurring roughly once in 65,000 pregnancies (or 1% of identical twins), with extremely high risk of death from umbilical cord entanglement, it was A LOT to take in. But we had many weeks and months to slowly come to grips with the reality of our situation. Although our MFM (maternal-fetal medicine doctor, aka high-risk OB) recommended going inpatient at 26 weeks with delivery by planned csection at 32 weeks, it was still a tough decision to make. We have four children at home, and me being away for 42-45 days was no easy feat for any of us!

As weeks passed and the babies grew, and while I also saw stories of women with proximate due dates lose their MoMo twins, it began to feel urgent to do ALL we could. My personal turning point was when I realized, "Would I live in the hospital for six weeks if it would mean Desmond didn't die?" So obvious that I would, a hundred t…

to desmond on his second birthday

Because I am pregnant with mono/mono twins, I will be admitted to the hospital at 26 weeks for constant monitoring, and deliver via csection no later than 32 weeks (sooner if babies show any signs of distress, as is common with growing mono/mono twins who can accidentally compress each other's umbilical cords). This means that week 32 happens the day before Jacinda's birthday. For this reason, we decided to celebrate her 3rd birthday approximately seven weeks early so that the focus can be on her and I'd be sure not to miss it! Plus, what two year old knows the difference between July 7 and August 29?

She had a very fun day. Jacinda is an incredibly happy, outgoing child and she has fun doing almost anything, but on her birthday this was especially true. She had her "friends" (mainly her siblings' friends, as she considers herself their equal) over and received many gifts and especially liked having everyone sing to her.

Preparing for the party meant I had to…


In April, we received word that an old friend had died 'unexpectedly.' This was a woman from church, but she attended the Evansville ward. We were in the same ward for nine years, and then after our return from a few  years in Bloomington, we would again see her from time to time passing in the halls or run into her and her grandchildren out in public. The last time I really talked to her was about a year ago, when I ran into her at a pizza/arcade with her family. Her name was Debbi. 

At the funeral, some of the comments seemed bizarre, even rude, to me. Afterwards David said, "I didn't realize she'd committed suicide." I hadn't either, apparently, even from the funeral, but in that light, the odd things people had said made more sense. (Still incredibly rude to stand at someone's funeral and say "Debbi wasn't perfect!" if you ask me.) Later, it was confirmed this was the cause of her death. When a mutual friend asked me what had happened…

The Big News

It's no secret that since Desmond's death in July 2016, we have wanted to have another child. There was a short delay initially because Dave had undergone a second vasectomy during that pregnancy, but in September 2016 we again traveled to St. Louis and he again had a vasectomy reversal (VR) with Dr. Thomas Sommers. VRs are never a sure thing but we had good success the first time (two pregnancies) so we were very hopeful. We did have a good return of sperm so we were good to go with trying. Unfortunately months went by with no luck so we returned to Boston IVF at The Women's Hospital, where we had used medicated IUI to conceive Jacinda in December 2014. Dr Griffin was very kind and said he believed that IUI could work for us again (especially since it worked on the first try with Jacinda!), but he wanted me to try a new medication. With Jacinda, I took Clomid, and I did not respond well, so I ended up having to take more and more of it until the side effects were terrible…

Winter catch-up

December was busy for us. Actually, at the end of November when we returned from a trip to Orange Beach for Thanksgiving, Dave took off for a work trip to Las Vegas, and I got a call from DCS looking for placement for a tiny newborn baby girl. I said yes! She was two weeks old. She'd been in foster care since 9 days old but the previous homes were full and could only keep her temporarily. She was tiny, barely 7 pounds, with bright red hair. This was an interesting experience for me, having a newborn that I didn't give birth to! She was for the most part a very easygoing baby. I put her on a 3-hour feed schedule immediately because I knew how much she was eating (not breastfeeding has its benefits!).

Dave came back and we all settled into a routine with a new little one. She just kind of accepted whatever love and attention we could spare her, and was happy with that. She had visits with her biological parents a few times a week, though they didn't always show up. I also go…

40 by 40, revisited

I had grand plans for a 40-by-40, a list of things to do before I turn 40.

One of those things on my list was,
Get back to pre-Lucy weight -OR- get pregnant (I'll settle for either)
WELL.... I am pregnant! More on that later, but being pregnant means that some items on my list are now not possible, or at least not safe. So I'm thinking of revisiting this next winter, and compiling a 41 by 41 list. Why not? It's just a number! The point is trying new things, right?

So, my updated list:

Grow and give away 500 flowers (can still do this!)
Go sledding/tubing - No.
Run a mile and be HAPPY ABOUT IT - maybe a vigorous walk?
See a Broadway show on Broadway - I saw a Broadway show at the Fox Theater in St Louis!
Fly on an airplane without a panic attack (completed 12/7/17) - done
Visit Acadia National Park - too long in the car
Eat lobstah in Maine - see above
See Stephen King's house (see how I can knock out several at once?) - see above
Learn my mom's chicken & dumpling…

40 by 40

I will turn 40 in 254 days, on September 11, 2018.

Yowza. FORTY.

I remember when my parents turned 40! In fact, they were both grandparents at 40!

To help with the "OMG I'm turning 40 blues" I have compiled a list of 40 things I want to do before I hit the big 4-0. Dave says, "Put it on your blog to make it official."

Some of these can be accomplished at one time or in one sitting; other items are long-term goals to work towards. On average I need to complete one every six or seven days, which means time's a-wastin!

In no particular order, here is my 40 by 40 list:

Grow and give away 500 flowers
Go sledding/tubing
Run a mile and be HAPPY ABOUT IT
See a Broadway show on Broadway
Fly on an airplane without a panic attack (completed 12/7/17)
Visit Acadia National Park
Eat lobstah in Maine
See Stephen King's house (see how I can knock out several at once?)
Learn my mom's chicken & dumplings recipe
Get back to pre-Lucy weight -OR- get pregnant (I'…